Rouge is the New Black

The Joy of Ethnically Ambiguous Wine

It's a question I get at least once a week. In various forms, of course, and some more polite than others. My favorite? "What tribe are you from?", which came from a random South Beach-ish flamer at the Dog park the other afternoon. But hey, I get it. Even for New York, I look a bit strange. And in the end I know that part of my allure is that people just can't place me with a single look. Greek? No. Moroccan? No. Israeli, then? Bitch, please...I have a Mexican father and an English mother. And yes, I know, you never would have guessed.

+ =

And what, pray tell, does all this have to do with wine? Well, maybe it's a bias that's genetically pre-determined, but I've always been a sucker for an ethnically ambiguous wine. That first blind sip that leaves you wondering: Italian? French? German? I just can't tell which! Of course, most of these wines come from a wine region in one country that directly borders another. Cultural proximity exerts a powerful kind of gravity on language, on custom, and particularly on wine. Others come from islands which, by there very nature, are aloof from mainland influence and open to the ideas which wash up on their shores from neighboring cultures. Still others, are the simple result of ex-pats taking up shop in a new land - whether because of war, religious persecution or an unquenchable taste for adventure. But regardless of origin, drinking ethnically ambiguous wine inevitably leads to a unique, engaging and fascinating experience that won't soon be forgotten. Just like me.

Some favorites border regions known for their ethnically ambiguous wines:

Alsace (France): This fertile little region's strategic importance has resulted in its hostile annexation by either France or Germany no less than five times in this century alone. While it currently resides under the French flag, you might not guess it between the German architecture, German-ish dialect, and distinctly German wine making influence. Riesling and Gewurztraminer are the region's number one grapes and while Pinot Gris and Pinot Blanc are often planted right along side them, what style of wine you'll find when they get inside the bottle is anyone's guess. Yet Germanic-lly austere, French-ly sensual, or somewhere in between, the wines are almost always a treat for the lover of interesting whites. Zind-Humbreht is one of the top dogs but Trimbach is more commonly stocked in wine shops and provides a fantastic introduction to the Alsatian novice.

Jura (France): This is one of those regions that when trying to explain to the uninitiated I hardly know where to begin. With geographic proximity to Switzerland, Italy and the French wine making region of Burgundy the reds produced here come in a beguiling gamut of styles but the region's most famous white wine - Vin Jaune - is know for it's similarities Spanish sherry.  Talk about ethnically ambiguous! You could spend a lifetime figuring our Jura but the wines of Jacques Puffeney from the sub-region of Arbois are a great place to start.

 
Vallee d'Aosta (Italy): Jutting off the Western border of Italy like an ear (or maybe the knotted bulge of a shoelace if you want to maintain the classic boot comparison) this semi-mountainous wine region is Italy's smallest both in terms of size and production. But don't let that fool you. With wine makers using everything from the Burgundies famous Pinot Noir to the Piedmont's famous Nebbiolo to an indigenous charmer called Fumin (possibly related to Syrah), Valle d'Aosta wine-making is sure to keep you guessing. Grosjean Fumin is a personal favorite: Rich and meaty as a Rhone, but with an undeniably Italian undercurrent of acidity and Mediterranean spice.

Some favorite islands known for their ethnically ambiguous wines:

Sardinia (Italy): Like Valle d'Aoste, Sardinia gets a healthy dose of French wine-making influence (specifically from its Northern neighbor Corsica - another great place for unusual wines), however with heavy Spanish and North African influence added to the mix this island is responsible for some of the most distinct and diversely flavored wines the Mediterranean has to offer.  In terms of unusual grapes, Sardinia's Cannanou (related to Spanish Garnacha) is a magnificent one to discover - Argiolas is but one of many fine producers.

Long Island (New York): What better place to look for ethnically ambiguous wine than on an island that juts off the world's largest melting party - New York City. Yes, while even many New Yorkers don't realize that they are a mere train ride away from one of North America's most interesting wine regions, to me Long Island is the hidden jewel of American wine making. From Chinon style Cabernet Franc made alongside Alsatian transplanted Pinot Blanc (Lieb Family Cellars) to Italian's vintifying Burgundian influenced Pinot Noir (Castello di Borghese) Long Island provides a true wealth of tasty confusion.

Some favorite ex-pat made ethnically ambiguous wines:

Damn Cheap: Domaine Monte de Luz Tannat (Uraguay): While there is certainly better Uruguayan Tannat on the market, you just can't beat the under $10 price tag on this one. Made by a true native of Frances' Madiran (where Tannat originally hails) but with definite New World influence. 

Not Particularly Cheap: Vinoptima "Ormond" Gewurztraminer (Gisborne, NZ): Second generation Croatian Nick Nobilo makes a lychee drenched Alsatian-style take on the German Gewurztraminer in the middle of New Zealand.  And yes, those of you who follow me, I am obsessed with this wine.

Right Out Pricey: Mount Mary "Quintet" (Yarra Valley, AUS): Ok, so Dr. Middleton doesn't exactly qualify as an ex-pat, but then if your white and from Australia...well you get the idea. Anyways, I never can quite figure out this wine, but in a definite good way. Made in one of Australia's cooler wine regions, at first sip this Bordeaux-style blend of Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, Cabernet Franc, Malbec, and Petit Verdot tastes like it could be straight out of Pommerol.  Yet, behind it there is something unusual, an untameable wild streak that distinguishes the wine as...well...ambiguous.

Tee Hee

From the Devil's Dreams to Medieval Schemes

(3 Fine Wines in 25 words or Less)

Devil's Lair Chardonnay 2005 (Margaret River, Australia) - $23
A pack of acid toothed devil dogs cooling their fiery heels in a barrel of rich, nutty, apple pie ooze.
Sex Appeal: 4/5     On the Tongue: 2.5/5     Bang For Your Buck: 4/5 

Prieur de Monterzagues Tavel Rose 2005 (Rhone Valley, France) - $23
Epic love story of Strawberries and Spice told against the backdrop of rugged mountain life.  Brokeback Mountain told through a bottle of wine?  You decide.
Sex Appeal: 3/5     On the Tongue: 5/5     Bang for Your Buck: 4.5/5

Sean Thackrey Pleiades XVI NV Blend (Bolinas, CA) - $23
Sexy, earthy, spicy, currants and ripe red berries Cote-Roti wink from a California quack who vintifies using long forgotten Medieval secrets.
Sex Appeal: 2/5     On the Tongue: 4.5/5     Bang for your Buck: 4/5

 

What the Ratings Mean

Sex Appeal:
Every aesthetic impression from the catchy ring of the wines name, to the flashiness of its label, to the "wow" factor of the first kiss (er...sip).  1 is equivalent to your average World of Warcraft player. 5 is a Marilyn Monroe (or Johnny Depp).

On The Tongue:
A more complex analysis of the wine on the palette after an extended French kiss.  1 is a tongue shoved down your throat.  5 is a one way ticket to the bedroom.

Bang For Your Buck:
This one should be fairly obvious.  1 ordered lobster, made you pick up the bill and didn't even bother with a kiss goodnight.  For dinner, 5 just ordered you.

Four Winemakers Who are Total Badasses (And Why They're Cooler Than You)

We here at RougeIsTheNewBlack have realized that in order to get one's blog noticed in this day in age of rampant inane blogging one must resort to Cracked.com style lists of random trivia presented with a comedic slant to garner anyones attention.  Never mind the bachelors degree in English or the Master Sommelier training...I'm off to take some classes at ACME Comedy and watch some old Letterman Top Tens for inspiration.  Meanwhile...

4. Nick Nobilo  (Vinoptima, New Zealand)

While most of us are content to wile away our final years rocking mindlessly away on a porch deck or rotting in the sun on the deck of some mammoth cruise vessel, not Nick Nobilo.  After years of running one of New Zealand's most successful wine companies (Nobilo Vineyards) Nick's retirement plan basically consisted of single handedly making the best damn Gewürztraminer the world has ever known.  So, upon singlehandely turning Nobilo vineyards into one of the most recognizable names in New Zealand wine and then negotiating the sale of the vineyard to BRL Hardy for a bucket load of cash, in 2003 Nick went ahead, bought a property in Gisborne, and in about two vintages did pretty much exactly what he had set out to do.  Yeah that's right, Nick made the best damn Gewürztraminer I've ever tasted in the time it takes most of us to get a piddly raise.

Now that he's successfully executed his retirement plan only God knows what Nick will do next.  My money is on creating a Cabernet that instantly raises your IQ or a Pinot Noir that by its very creation makes California Pinot Noir not suck anymore.  Frankly, I wouldn't put any miracle past this guy.

 

Why He's Cooler Than You
Well let's start with the fact that his Gewürztraminer has been known to drop panties with the very first sip (personal experience...I do not lie).  Let's follow that with the fact that his retirement plan is far cooler than your 401k (if you even have one).  Then to complete the "cooler than you" trifecta let's quietly consider the fact that prior to his retirement the sale of Nobilo Vineyards left him with only slightly less money than God.  Yup, definitely cooler than you.

3. Sergio Mionetto (Mionetto Prosecco, Italy)
I had the pleasure of meeting Sergio Mionetto one night over a small tasting dinner held in his honor at a little Italian Restaurant back in Minneapolis, Minnesota.  Honestly, I wasn't expecting much, just another dinner full of the twin cities stuffy wine elite.  Boy was I wrong.

Sergio at eighty some years old has the basic demeanor of a leprechaun on an insane coke binge.  Combine that with a tendency to randomly launch into Italian drinking songs and an eye that definitely tended to wander towards the ladies in the room and it was soon clear that this wasn't going to be one of those polite pinkie finger raised sort of tastings.  Sergio had put a bottle of Prosecco down before some guests had even raised their glass and with a short emphatic speech on the virtues of enthusiastic drinking he made it clear that sipping was not going to be the preferred method of consumption while in his company.

Not content with the act of normal civilized glass clinking, Sergio has developed his own method of the toast, one that he executes with frightening gusto at the slightest provocation.  The method can best be described as a fencing match between champagne flutes and ended up in the shattering of glass into a million tiny shards at least once in the evening.  Sergio wan't fazed, he just grabbed another glass and drank on.

The fact that this is the only man on earth who has ever elevated the normally proletariat Prosecco to the aristocratic level of its neighbor Champagne may be difficult to believe, however, a single taste of one of Sergio's Sparkling Roses leaves no doubt that the man's rock star lifestyle has no effect on his wine making prowess.  As the first Italian to preach the gospel of Prosecco to the heathen American hordes, Sergio can additionally be credited with saving many a soul from the eternal damnation of over priced Champagne.  Yes, Sergio has basically made a profession of being both rock star and savior channeling a combined incarnation of Jesus Christ and Jim Morrison with a generous dash of Dom Perignon. 

Sergio credits his health, energy and general badassedness to vigorous and daily consumption of ridiculous quantities of his own wine.  When asked if he ever suffered hangovers from his daily indulgence he gave a saucy wink and through his translator gave us this little gem. "No hangovers in the morning...just more Prosecco"

Why He's Cooler Than You
From my single experience meeting Sergio Mionetto I have absolutely no doubt that this picture was taken just moments before Mr. Mionetto offered these two little ladies a private tasting of his favorite vintages.   Neither have I any doubt that this offer was instantly accepted.  I'm further willing to wager that his favorite vintages were not the only thing that got tasted that evening.  Which is pretty much why Sergio Mionetto is without a doubt cooler than you.

2. Mathew Donaldson (Pegasus Bay Vineyards, New Zealand)
Ok, so I have most of this one on hearsay from a certain chef friend of mine but let's just say that if even a quarter of this stuff is true then Mathew Donaldson easily deserves the #2 position on this list.

Mathew is the second generation wine making head of New Zealand's family owned and operated Pegasus Bay Vineyards, a widely respected maker of Pinot Noir and Riesling that has pretty much put Waipara on the map.  His father, brought the meticulous nature of a Professor of Neurology to wine-making, grounding Pegasus Bay in a philosophy of low yields and sustainable farm methods.  His mother, Christine, made the winery a viable business and integrated her love of the arts with a huge natural amphitheater on the vineyard's property that plays host to New Zealand's finest operas and orchestras.

Let's just say that Mathew, while fully responsible for the making  of the vineyards indisputably fine red wines, doesn't limit himself to his parent's quiet sophisticated tastes in the arts and academia. Quite the contrary.  Borrowing his mother's amphitheater in the operatic off-season, Mathew is known amongst the New Zealand party set for throwing some of the wildest raves fueled with copious amounts of his trademark wines along with God knows what else.  While his father quietly pen's wine reviews back in Waipara, Mathew travels the world pouring generous glasses of his wines for anyone in his company and then leading all night party binges that are only faintly recalled by those less badass than he (that would be just about everyone).

On a recent visit to New York, Mathew apparently lead this certain chef friend of mine on one such adventure that included countless VIP sections and gentelman's clubs, until at around 7am my chef friend was forced to call it a night.  Compeltely unfazed, Mathew partied on for THREE MORE DAYS, during which time his hosts franticly searched for him, regularly checking his hotel room, to which he did not return once during this time.

Did I mention that Mathew is married to every wine geeks dream?  His wife, Lynette, is a genius oenologist who just happens to have a taste for white wine and mini-skirts.  She is single handedly responsible for all the white wines at Pegasus Bay and one can imagine the lecherous look on Mathew's face below:

Why He's Cooler Than You
(Rave style parties on a stage originally made for operas) + (3 day party binges) + (hot wine making wife)...umm, you do the math.  Need help?  (Mathew Donaldson) = (Way cooler than you)

1. Didier Dagueneau (Pouilly Fume, France)
Probably the only winemake ever to be as comfortable in a biker bar or an ice shelf as he is in an elite wine tasting, since 1982, Didier Dageuneau has been raising both grape vines and eyebrows on his 28 acre Loire Valley estate.  With wine making methods that range from the particular (gravity wine presses, biodynamic farming) to the Howard Hughes (severe pruning, de-budding,de-leafing...all by hand) Didier has consistently produced enthralling wines that are eagerly awaited each year by his rabidly faithful cult following.

Not afraid to make a few enemies along the way, Didier has regularly and vocally called out his neighboring wine makers for employing practices that cheapen the image of Pouilly Fume including over-production and capitalization (adding sugar to pressed grapes to increase alcohol).  Dider doesn't fuck around when he's making Sauvignon Blanc and as far ashe's concerned...neither should anyone else.

When he's not busy crafting the finest drops of Sauvignon Blanc to ever grace the mortal tongue, Didier entertains himself by racing sled dogs and riding his motorcycle Hell's Angel style through neighboring vineyards, no doubt contemplating their winemaker's death and dismemberment for offenses against the sacred grape (Didier makes his wine in a building that uncannily resembles a cathedral).

Can I mention one more time that his name is Didier...and no one makes fun of that fact.  At least, know one who's lived to tell about it.

Why He's Cooler Than You
Tell you what. Tomorrow night, you try going to a Hell's Angel bar, introduce yourself as Didier, and order a round of Sauvignon Blanc from the glaring tattooed bartender.  When, a few hours later, your beaten senseless body returns to consciousness soaked in a pool of urine and abandoned in a deserted back alley, you can begin to contemplate precisely how cool this "little" French wine maker truly is.  That's right.  Didier Dagueneau: total badass.

Spice Tales: Aleppo

Aleppo is an enchanting spice made from the grounds of the dried Aleppo Chili which finds its origins in and around the Syrian city of the same name.  With a pleasant yet moderate hear and cumin like undertones that support a subtle harmony of dessert fruit, Aleppo is best suited towards rich and earthy flavored meats with a similar geographic origin such as lamb or goat.  It can also made a delightful accent to a simple lunch of aged cheddar, Genoa Salami and crisp water crackers enjoyed upon a sun bathed terrace while dreaming of exotic journeys the Middle East.

When pairing a dish that uses Aleppo as a primary component think dark, smoky and mysterious when you choose the wine.  The red wines of Bandol in the south of France are a rare 100% expression of the grape Mourvedre (most often used as a blending grape alongside Grenache and Syrah throughout the Southern Rhone) and exhibit ravishing nuances of tobacco, leather, and garrigue spices set against a backdrop of rich dark berries.  Try Domaine Tempier or Chateau de Pibarnon as good starting points before diving into the wealth of lesser known yet often equally outstanding producers.

Where to get it?
Aleppo
Domaine  Tempier
Chateau de Pibarnon

Drink up my darlings!

Naughty Mature Hotty (or WILF...Yeah, I said It)

The Wine:
1997 Kalin Cellars Semillon (Livermore Valley)

The Place:
Livermore Valley, California

The Grape: 

75% Semillon, 25% Sauvignon Blanc

The Skinny:

Back in the days of my flirtations with the collegiate experience, I will admit I did have a thing for older woman.  Nicole Kidman, was my favorite celebrity crush, I flirted shamelessly one night with a visiting fifty year old poet, and in general found a little age to bring a lot of hot.  One sip of the gloriously mature 1997 Kalin Cellars Semillon sure did go a long way to awakening these memories! 

Kalin Cellars is owned and operated by the dynamic husband and wife duo of Terry and Frances Leighton, two serious wine makers who don't allow a single part of the vintification process to go without the guidance their deft touch.  Between holdings in Livermore Valley and Sonoma County the winery only puts out about 7000 cases of wine annually and not a single one of these bottles is one I wouldn't want to wrap my little lips around.   Parents everywhere take note...considering the awful temptation a young bottle of Kalin Semillon might make, the Leightons don't allow their wines out of their sight until their old enough to stand up on their own...a practice that you might want to consider to take a few percentage points off the old teen pregnancy statistics (Yes Lynn Spears, I'm talking to you).

The 1996 Semillon hails from actual Chateau Y'quem cut vines and if that means anything to you, you can probably just stop reading now and start on your hunt for this hard to come by gem.  Otherwise, my little winos, get ready for a loving ode to the poetic nature of perfectly riped juice.

Oh, yes, twelve years in the bottle have given this little wine some time for definite introspection and the surety and grace of the golden hued liquid as it flows from the bottle is evidence enough of that fact.  Preserved Lemon, notes of wet stone, and hints of wax cling to a tapestry of yeasty, nutty goodness that  dance over the tongue on a stage of perfect acidity.   Ten years ago this would have been a crime...now its time to drink up. Drink up!

The Price:

$25 (Oh, and Public Restaurant in Nolita has 6 bottles left to my knowledge...go get it!)

A Declaration of War on The Vines of California

The Wine:
2003 Lapis Luna Petite Verdot (San Luis Obispo)

The Place:

San Luis Obispo, California

The Grape: 

Petite Verdot

The Skinny:

For some things to flower they must be ripped from the place that they call home and raised for a few years in quiet anonymity before suddenly sparking into a relentless blaze of glory. Take the Petite Verdot grapes that Lapis Luna transmuted into their fine 2004 offering. Back in the old Bordeaux, Petite Verdot is little more than an after thought…a red headed step child so to speak. Ripening far slower than its more commonly recognized siblings (Cab Sauv, Cab Franc, Merlot and Malbec) in a region with a relatively short growing season, Petite Verdot tends to be under-ripe and bitter at harvest which has led to its use in only the minutest quantities to add "color" and "stiffness in the mid-pallate" to the Bordeaux blend. Yeah, that's about as sexy as it sounds. Anyways, enter the United States, its love affair with Cab, the subsequent Mondavi driven forays into Meritage (I.E. Cali wines blended in Bordeaux style) and suddenly vintners were off to the Bordeaux to take some clippings of Petite Verdot to plant in small quantities so we could be just like France. Only we're not, and thank god, someone somewhere along the way realized it. In California, the growing season is long enough for Petite Verdot to ripen consistently and in the right hands can make a spellbinding wine all on its very own. Thus, ever so slowly, the relentless blaze of Petite Verdot glory begins and with a little help from Lapis Luna so it seems.

 

Ok, ok, I'm bored sick from the history lesson too. Let's do some drinking already…

My nose perks us instantly on the first wiff of this enchantingly crimson wine as discernable hints of menthol and cinnamon bob through a mixed berry nose. Now it's the tongues turn. I don't sip delicately as I can already tell that it's not that kind of wine and so instead I go for a big draught. Fireworks! Pockets of leathery spice are explosively nestled in a field of blackberry and gooseberry that synthesize into my favorite array of sweet, sour and spice. Then the finish: the acid melts into a lingering sense of satisfaction that keeps my mouth watering for at least a minute. Oh yes, we have a winner. I'm thinking smoked paprika spiced duck with mushrooms and basil and *bang* - we're on to something here. Or I could just sit and drink the whole bottle with nothing else but the anticipation of a well deserved hangover in the morning. And still I'd be happy.

Half a bottle later, I'm going to say something a little bold here.

California, forgive me. But as far as I'm concerned it might be a great service to the Golden State and its oft over rated wine if someone were to go through and pull up half the Cabernet Sauvignon vines and plant some more freakin' Petite Verdot. And then let Lapis Luna make the wine. Oh dear, I can already hear the death threats starting to pile up in my mailbox. Gotta run…

The Price:

$19.95 (click here)

Vin is the New Couture (And Other Initial Musings)

My Darling Winos,

It is my greatest pleasure to welcome you to Rouge is the New Black, the penultimate blog of wine, fashion and everything in between.  Over the coming weeks you can prepare yourself for an assault on your sense of taste that will include:

• Wine Reviews featuring the Four Chihuahua Paws Rating System
• New York Street Fashion as viewed through our special Wine goggles
• Random musings on Wine and Fashion
• Zombie is the New Corked

In the meanwhile, I invite you to consider with me the many similarities between the worlds of wine and fashion.  To wit:

Wine has vintages; Fashion has vintage stores

Some Wines are made specifically for slender bottles; some Fashions are made specifically for slender bodies (irritatingly!)

Both Wine and Fashion snobs operate under the misguided belief that they alone have taste

There is nothing more pretentious than a Bordeaux Wine tasting; oh wait, I forgot Fashion week

Wine and Fashion are both subject to some bullsh*t rule about eschewing white between labor day and memorial day

Nothing says sexy like a Burgundy Wine/Dress

The very best of both wine and fashion are made by Italians with unpronounceable names

That's all for now, so drink up, my darlings!

-The Accidental Wine Steward